January 10,2006 | CINCINNATI -- The mummified body of a woman who didn't want to be buried was found in a chair in front of her television set 2 1/2 years after her death, authorities said.

Johannas Pope had told her live-in caregiver that she didn't want to be buried and planned on returning after she died, Hamilton County Coroner O'Dell Owens said Monday.

Pope died in August 2003 at age 61. Her body was found last week in the upstairs of her home on a quiet street. Some family members continued to live downstairs, authorities said. No one answered the doorbell at Pope's home Monday afternoon.

It could take weeks to determine Pope's cause of death because little organ tissue was available for testing, Owens said.

>An air conditioner had been left running upstairs, and that allowed the body to slowly mummify, he said. The machine apparently stopped working about a month ago, and the body began to smell.

"Standing outside, one could smell death," Owens said.

Police went to the house last Wednesday after receiving a call from a relative who hadn't seen Pope in years. They found a staircase behind a door blocked by a basket and climbed to the second floor, where they found the body.

It was not clear if any crimes were committed, Owens said.

Authorities did not identify the caregiver, a women in her 40s who apparently lived in the home with Pope, Pope's daughter and her 3-year-old granddaughter.

"The caregiver is not someone you'd think was from another planet or really seems off the wall -- (she's) a pretty normal kind of person," he said. "But I think out of loyalty, friendship and love of her friend, (she) decided to keep the body at home."

Who Me? was a top secret sulfurous stench weapon developed by the American Office of Strategic Services during WWII to be used by the French Resistance against German officers. Who Me? smelled strongly of fecal matter, and was issued in pocket atomizers intended to be unobtrusively sprayed on a German officer, humiliating him and, by extension, demoralizing the occupying German forces.

The experiment was very short-lived however. Who me? had a high concentration of extremely volatile sulfur compounds that were extremely difficult to control: more often than not the person who does the spraying ended up smelling as bad as the sprayee. After only two weeks it was concluded that Who Me? was a dismal failure. It remains unclear whether there was ever a successful Who Me? attack.

Pam Dalton, a psychologist at the Monell Chemical Senses Center in Philadelphia decribes the smell of Who Me? as resembling "the worst garbage dumpster left in the street for a long time in the middle of the hottest summer ever".

A recipe for a kilogram of the same or equivalent substance in circulation on the Internet consists of 919 grams of white mineral oil as inert carrier, and 20g of skatole, 20g of n-butanoic acid, 20g of n-pentanoic acid, 20g of n-hexanoic acid, and 1g of pentanethiol as the active principles.

I was using Google Image to search for "Anouk Aimee" today (because, really, what else would one do in one's spare time?) and I found this photo. Compare with this hot little number I have hanging in my closet -- not a bad likeness! Will someone please host a formal dinner party so I can debut my fabulous outfit? Thank you.